Ah, Christmas. The most wonderful time of the year as the constant onslaught of advertising is only too keen to remind us. A time of angelic, rosy-cheeked children, loving, relaxed parents, happy extended families, showpiece homes, perfectly decorated trees and tables groaning with festive cheer. Except that, as we all know, the reality of the seasonal holidays can be very different, and especially as a stressed out mum who is trying to juggle work, caring responsibilities and trying to be a flawless wife, mother, daughter, friend and all around domestic goddess, running yourself ragged to make sure everyone else enjoys the festivities.
The truth is that winter can be a hard season on our physical and mental wellbeing. Couple this with the unique pressure to have an Instagram perfect festive break, and all the extra work and emotional strain that generates, and it’s easy to see a lot of mums are feeling stressed out, exhausted and very much in need of a break.
There’s no end to the pressures at this time of year – from making school play costumes and finding theperfect teacher gifts, to mediating family tensions, paying out for expensive gifts, and all the extra time spent wrapping, cleaning, cooking, decorating and generally trying to take care of the big picture and every little detail.
It’s very normal for this whirl of activity to leave you feeling burnt out. So instead of trying to soldier on regardless, and not really enjoying the break yourself, making a plan for how to care for yourself this festive season is a great idea to keep your mental and physical wellbeing in balance. Don’t see looking after yourself as bottom of the priority list – Santa’s main helper deserves a little special treatment after all! Supporting yourself will enable you to support others in turn – and have you set for a truly magical Christmas that could be at least a little relaxing for you!
Space Out Your Plans
Unless you are a total social butterfly, the thought of so many large occasions crammed together in the calendar can be enough to make you anxious. With each one comes the pressure to show up, dress up and make sparkling conversation – all of which can feel like a big ask after a demanding week at work and with the kids. If your diary is looking more intimidating than fun, then it could be time to take a step back. You don’t have to automatically say yes to every invitation that comes your way. – if you don’t want to go to that work Christmas party or the thought of nibbles at your Aunty’s house fills you with dread – simply don’t do. The power of no can be extremely liberating. Often we won’t refuse things for fear of upsetting others or becoming disliked – but there’s nothing terrible about respecting your own time, or admitting when you’re exhausted. If you respect your boundaries, other people are likely to follow suit. Try to space out your diary and avoid cramming it with too many visits and parties if it’s going to be a source of stress to you. Another handy trick can be to set a time limit for visits – even if that means pretending you have something urgent to do in a couple of hours. Or if you always end up hosting and that’s stressing you out, arrange to meet friends or family on neutral ground like a cafe or a pub so you don’t have to run around after them. Schedule in a few calm days at home where you can just enjoy being together with immediate family in a no-pressure environment. Don’t worry about cramming your kid’s days full of festive activities either – they’re just as likely to enjoy some downtime and a chance to play with an appreciate new gifts in the whirlwind of activity.
Make Some Time For Yourself
This can feel easier said than done, but it can and should be a priority. You only have so many hours in one day, but it’s not wrong to take one or two of those completely for yourself. Plan in a little me time and put it into your calendar app so that it’s just as important as any other meeting or social engagement. What you do is up to you – whether you fancy a de-stressing online Yoga class or you simply want to put your feet up with a latte and that novel you’ve been meaning to read all year – stop putting time to yourself to the bottom of your list. You can’t take on the world if you’re running on low batteries.
Avoid Toxic People
We all have them – that one family member or work colleague whose very presence makes you feel twitchy. It’s not realistic to suppose that we’ll get on with everyone in our lives, and that fact doesn’t change just because it’s Christmas. In fact, being thrown together can intensify it even more. Limit your exposure to toxic people to keep a lid on your festive stress levels. Sometimes you can’t avoid someone entirely, but minimise your interactions with them. You could also ask a friend or a loved one to act as a buffer – if they see this person getting to you, they will come to the rescue and distract them. Being exposed to negative energy can really get you down and leave you struggling to cope, so find ways to minimise contact with those who get to you. Keep your visits deliberately short, meet up in a bigger group or just try that magic word ‘no’ if there’s an especially difficult event.
Look After Your Body And Mind
Our mental and physical wellbeing are intimately connected, and as people tend to naturally get more run down in winter this can have an impact on how stressed we get and how hard everything else feels in turn. Go back to basics and make sure your body – and therefore your mind – is cared for properly. Stay hydrated, with green tea or hot water and lemon juice if you want something warmer. Be mindful of indulging in too many processed or sugary foods – eat them by all means, but balance them out by also making sure that you eat a rainbow of seasonal fruits and vegetables as well. Monitor your alcohol intake and try not to have too many blow-outs. Consider adding a superfood green powder, a Vitamin D supplement and a probiotic to your diet to keep all systems running smoothly. Switch to an intensive lotion like e45 to balance the ski-drying effects of heating and harsher weather. And try to ensure that you’re getting good quality rest by practicing good sleep hygiene by banning electronic devices from the bedroom, ensuring the room you sleep in is cooler and dark enough, and exploring things like melatonin supplements, aromatherapy pillow sprays andmindfulness apps if you have trouble dropping off at night.
Do A Screen Detox
Social media is great for keeping in touch, but it definitely has a lot to answer for in terms of exacerbating the pressure we all feel to have that ‘perfect’ Christmas. That’s why the holidays are the perfect time to step back from our screens and take part in a little digital detox. Escape the pressure of a rolling feed of picture-perfect homes, dinners and families with angelic kids in matching Christmas pyjamas by making a conscious effort to switch off for a while. Either you can choose to power down your smartphone and stash it away in a drawer for a while, or you can use an app that blocks your social media accounts for a predetermined amount of time. Either way, giving yourself a little break and concentrating on family time can do wonders for your mental health, especially if you can also enforce a ban on the kid’s phones and tablets as well.
Get Out And About In The Fresh Air
The festive season generally involves lots of indoor activities, and sometimes taking a break and going outside is just the remedy you need. Exposure to sunlight can help to retune the body’s Circadian Rhythms and give your mood a boost – even just half an hour of a brisk walk outside at lunchtime can make a big difference to how you feel. Bonus points if you can combine being outside with some kind of exercise as well. A run outside or even joining a bootcamp class can help you get moving and shake off the worst of the festive slump – not to mention helping to counteract the effects of all those naughty treats! Hit up YouTube for a quick HIIT workout that you can take outside to the local park or even your own back garden. With a little bit of effort, you can easily flip your holiday from lacklustre to one where your needs are taken care of and you’re re-energised and ready to take on the world. Forward planning is key, and then you can relax and enjoy the festivities with a new sense of appreciation.
This is a collaborative post.
