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I’ve talked about the importance of reaching out before
But it seems I’m better at giving advice than I am at taking it. Even my own. Because I’ve really been struggling lately, and instead of opening up and talking about it, I just crawled into my own little bubble and let it get worse.
So I’m going to take my own advice
In for a penny, in for a pound, and all that… I’m going to bypass talking to one person and talk to you lot instead! So… where to start?
I lost my mojo around Christmas. I love Christmas (I’ve mentioned that once or twice, too). We were all ill over Christmas and it was hard enough finding the energy to look after the twins, let alone do anything else. My blog suffered in January. I didn’t realise at the time that I was suffering, too.
I very recently started another little business, as a Cambridge Weight Plan Consultant, and I think maybe I was trying to spread myself a little bit too thin. It’s hard work building a new business, especially while trying to keep up with the blogging schedule I set for myself last year.
I’ve had to realise that I can’t do everything all at the same time
I was so exhausted, but I didn’t think about just slowing down. Instead, I started thinking that I wasn’t good enough. That I should be able to look after two 2 year olds, write 3 blog posts a week, find ways to monetise my blog, build a business from scratch and keep on top of the housework etc, all at the same time. Who am I kidding? I never did very well at that last one.
Anyway, so I started thinking that I should be able to do all of those things and, because I couldn’t, I was somehow not good enough and I was ashamed to admit that. So I pretended that I was OK and kept punishing myself by trying to do all the things I had already realised I couldn’t do.
All that happened was that all the things I was trying to do suffered. I became grumpy with the twins, which is not the kind of parent I want to be. I wasn’t managing even one blog post some weeks and, although I was making a little bit of an income from my blog, it really was “a little bit”. And I’ve been stressing myself out over my new business, worrying that it’s not growing quickly enough.
My mental health has really suffered
I spent most of the day in tears today, because a client cancelled her appointment. That wasn’t really the reason – it was just the final straw. It wasn’t the right time for her to be on plan and The 1:1 Diet by Cambridge Weight Plan is definitely a plan that you need to be in the right frame of mind for. She gave it a go, it wasn’t for her. It happens. Cancelling her appointment wasn’t anything personal and for every person who tries it and find it’s not for them, there are plenty of people who do amazingly and change their lives. But I’ve had a bad week with my mental health and, when that one client cancelled her appointment, I felt like I’d failed her, because I couldn’t help her achieve her weight loss goals.
My poor babies really tried to look after me this afternoon, but they’re not even 3 yet. I don’t want them to see Mummy crying all the time. So I know it’s time for me to start taking care of myself.
I’m looking into counselling
I really do think it’s important to reach out and ask for help, so I’m taking my own advice and looking into counselling to help me work through my current depression.
I’ve dialled back on my expectations for my blog. I want to get my mojo back and enjoy blogging again. I am making a little bit of money from my blog, and that’s lovely, but I want to just focus on enjoying writing about the things that are important to me.
And I’m trying to be realistic about how quickly I can grow my business, with two toddlers to look after. It is growing and that’s what’s important. I’m helping people to achieve their weight loss goals and I’m doing brilliantly with my own (that’s for another blog post) and that’s good enough. Rome wasn’t buillt in a day.
Since I’m taking my own advice..
I’m going to ask you to take it, too. If you’re struggling. If you’ve got too much on your plate and you feel like everything is getting on top of you. Take a minute to breathe and ask for help. No one will think any less of you for it.